Mess Is Mine
by FindingTheInbetween
Summary: Elizabeth is living abroad when tragedy strikes the Bennet family, prompting her to come home for the first time in 5 years. She wasn't expecting to stay and she certainly wasn't wasn't expecting to fall in love. Modern AU.
1. Day In The Life

Chapter One: A Day In The Life

" _The human person cannot face up to a bad outcome, that's just the deal."_

 **Barbara Kingsolver**

The setting sun beat down on my face as I leaned back in my chair. I took a sip of my mojito and looked out over the Nam Song River, promptly deciding that this was what life was a about, simple tranquillity.

Vang Vieng was a world of its own, its dusty streets were crowded with tourists, but still held a sense of authenticity many other places had failed to hold on to and it was easy to see why when I looked to the mostly untouched landscape. The small town was surrounded by karst hills and the river was clear and unpolluted. I hated to admit that my stay here was simply a pit stop on my way up to Luang Prabang, I'd only been there for two days but I wanted to stay a lifetime.

There was something special about Laos that made me never want to leave, I couldn't decide whether it was the amazing people or the food that kept me hooked. From the throngs of ex-pats opening bars on the main road to the amazing kayaking and hikes through the mountains, this place was an adventurers dream.

I heard a glass being placed on the table and I turned my head to see that my boyfriend Denny had delivered me another mojito. It was two for one cocktails between 5 and 7 and boy you would not find me complaining.

"What's the plan for tomorrow?" I asked Denny as he took the seat opposite mine.

"I booked us a balloon ride over the town at sunrise, it's supposed to be awesome." He replied. I wasn't sure if this was the appropriate time to mention I was deathly scared of heights, though at this point of our relationship I would have thought he would have already known that.

"Oh wow, that does sound great thanks. Our bus ride to Luang Prabang leaves at 3 so that leaves us plenty of time." I said, Denny isn't very good at keeping track of anything; that was my job. Silence enveloped us and we suddenly found ourselves with nothing to say to each other.

"Some of the guys are heading down to _Kangaroo Sunset_ tonight if you wanted to come." He said after some time, though when Denny said 'guys' he meant the horde of Contiki boys that he played endless games of beer pong with the night before.

"I will give that one a miss, have fun though." I said. He just shrugged, quickly finished his drink and took off back towards the hotel without so much of a goodbye, not that I really expected one, it wasn't how Denny rolled and I that's what I liked about him.

Denny and I worked together in the same hotel in the Phra Nakhon District of Bangkok and like many others in our position we used this as our home base while we backpacked during the off-season.

Denny was from California and with it came a relaxed attitude and an adventurous outlook on life. I often joked that he looked like Joey from the movie _10 Things I Hate About You_ , not that he appreciated that reference and would reciprocate by calling me his 'Ginger Ninja'. To be fair, he had these chiseled cheek bones and a look that screamed failed actor, all he needed to do was shoot me a 'pensive' look and he'd be a dead ringer for Joey.

I was nineteen when we met, I had been working in Bangkok for a year at that point, and I was straight out of school with only my Tourism certificate to back me up. I was young, idealistic and not ready for any sort of romantic commitment and neither was he. It was a match made in heaven. At first it seemed to be endless drinking sessions down on Khao San Road with the other hotel workers, then suddenly we were branching off by ourselves and soon after that we just fell into a sort of relationship from there. We'd been together two years, though it seemed a lot longer, I didn't know if that was a good thing or bad thing at this point. I was just trying to enjoy myself.

The crickets began chirping and the mosquitoes were biting, but I would have it no other way. I was truly living the dream. I got to travel most of the year and I had the best work colleagues back in Bangkok.

I finished off my drink and decided to take a walk down to the river. The night was hot and sticky, my shirt clung to my back and I could feel my thongs rubbing against the top of my feet, I knew that I would end up with blisters by the end of the night. I could smell various meats being barbequed on the streets, mostly chicken, though I did see some that looked suspiciously like rat.

Fruit drinks and filled rolls were being hocked by locals every twenty metres. Korean students were stumbling out of bars drunk wrecks, there was a group of English lads chatting up some Polish girls in front of one of the many bars and I could hear my fellow Australians crying out 'Aussie, Aussie, Aussie, oi, oi, oi' from the Irish Pub just around the corner and in that moment I missed home more than I had in five years and I smiled to myself, it was all so imperfectly perfect.

I got to the river bank and saw the lights of the small riverside bars reflecting onto the still water. It was a cloudless night, stars dotted the dark sky, I could make out some constellations and the moon shone brightly, casting a silver glow on my surroundings.

I crossed the rickety wooden bridge, making way for other foot passengers and dodging motorcycles. I had no clue how the bridge didn't collapse under the weight of the bikes.

There was a small bar next to the bridge so naturally I made a bee-line for it and ordered a huge _Beer Lao_. I had just settled on one of the pontoons sitting out in the shallows of the river when my phone rang. I pulled out my phone and looked, it was my sister Jane. I quickly answered it would have been past midnight in Melbourne and she wouldn't have called so late unless it was something important.

"Hi Jane, what's up?" I answered.

I heard her take a deep breath. "Lizzie, its dad." She said simply.

My heart began to race in trepidation. "What about dad?" I asked.

I could hear her choke back tears. "He was rushed to hospital this afternoon. He collapsed at work."

"And?" I asked searching for more information.

"They found a tumour, its cancer." Jane told me softly. The world suddenly seemed to stop spinning and my stomach dropped.

"What type of Cancer?" I heard myself ask.

"Stage 4 bowel cancer, the 5 year survival rate is less than eight percent and the doctors have given him less than a year." Her voice was strangled, she was rattling off the statistics as if it would somehow make it less real, less personal.

"Surely with Chemo-" I began, my voice trailing off as the gravity of the situation began to hit me.

"He doesn't want to do treatment and all they can do for him now is make him comfortable until," her voice trailed off. "Until he dies." she finished. The words seemed too harsh. Too final.

"I think I'm going to come home." I said. I hadn't been home in five long years, I wasn't even sure if it was home anymore.

Jane hesitated. "Lizzie, I have to tell you something."

"What is it?" I asked distracted.

"Never mind." She sighed.

"Okay," I began. "I'll call you with my flight details when I get booked."

I heard a crash and a male swearing from Jane's end. "I have to go. Love you and see you soon." Jane said quickly, promptly hanging up on me as she did so.

Now all I had to do was tell Denny. I quickly downed the rest of my beer and walked briskly back to my hotel. I ran up the stairs to my room two at a time. I dug through my bag and pulled out my tablet and promptly began searching for flights.

Denny found me asleep on top of my tablet, snoring my head off, or so he says. He woke me up and told me to hop into bed. He reeked of _Lao-Lao_ and had a look of guilt that I chose to ignore. I made the decision to tell him what had happened when he was sober, there was no need for me to deal with an emotional drunk man as well.

I knew one thing for sure. It was going to be a long few days.

 **AN: I wrote most of this story when I was feeling homesick while travelling through Asia over Christmas. The group I travelled with was full of Aussie's and we all got strangely patriotic when we got a few beers in us, chanting "Aussie, Aussie, Aussie", belting out Waltzing Matilda and butchering Land Down Under was a regular occurrence. It wasn't just us, it seemed like a common thing.**

 **I just thought I'd clarify a few things first in case anyone was wondering.**

 **Certificates –** _They are basic post-secondary school qualifications in Australia and in Victoria some schools offer students to undertake a certificate alongside their VCE (Victorian Certificate of Education) qualification._

 **Contiki –** _A tour company that runs tours all over the world for 18 – 35 year olds, very popular in Australia._

 **Kangaroo Sunset –** _It's a real bar in Vang Vieng. I spent most nights there when I was in Vang Vieng and when I was there it was jam packed with Aussie's._

 **Thongs –** _Aussie slang for Flip-Flops, in case you didn't already know._

 **Beer Lao –** _Thailand has Chang Beer, Laos has Beer Lao. It's cheap and nasty yet strangely satisfying._

 **Lao-Lao –** _Laotian rice-whiskey, it's actually awesome_.

 **If you like my story by all means review. Thank you.**


	2. Go

Chapter Two: Go

" _If you have to speculate if someone loves you and wants to be with you, chance are they don't. It's not complicated. Love, in most cases, betrays the one feeling it. Don't waste moments waiting and wondering. Don't throw away your time dreaming of someone that doesn't want you."_

 _-_ **Donna Lynn Hope**

I possibly picked the worst time to have this conversation. Here I was, clinging to a basket 2,000 feet in the air questioning why I even agreed to this ride in the first place. Here I was, flying over Vang Vieng, trying not to vomit and shaking like leaf preparing to have one of the most important conversation of my life.

It was just me and Denny and I knew if I didn't take this opportunity to talk to him I never would.

If we were on the ground Denny would find an exit, he always found an exit, walking away from a tough situation was his strong suit. Can't blame him though, I didn't like confrontation either, but at least I could face up to it.

"Denny," I began softly. He looked at me expectantly, his brown eyes shining brightly in the morning sun. "We need to talk." Those four little words was all it took from Denny's expression turn from cool, calm and collected to full blown panic.

"Oh shit." Denny stammered. "You know." He looked around, trying to find an escape route, and for the briefest of moments I honestly thought that he would jump out.

"Know what?" I asked confused.

I knew everything there was to know about Denny, from his favourite song to what he had for breakfast on Tuesday. Well, at least I thought I knew everything.

"Never mind," he said quickly. "What did you want to say?"

I let it go, there was no use arguing, what would it accomplish in the grand scheme of things? Nothing.

I took a deep breath, trying to gather my thoughts. "I'm going home." I said.

The word 'home' felt foreign to me, I didn't even know what home was anymore.

"Home?" He asked. "What back to Bangkok?"

"Back to Melbourne." I said simply. He looked at me with confusion but didn't press me for more information, he wasn't fazed in the slightest. "I need to be with my family." I said after a long pause.

It seemed like all our conversations were full of long pauses and unasked questions. I didn't know what it all meant, Denny was my first real boyfriend particularly because I chose to count the one week fling I had in high school.

"Wait, didn't you see your family like six months ago?" Denny asked.

My family came to visit me every year, we chose a different country each time and spent a week or two exploring and getting up to mischief. I was a great alternative to me coming home because not only did they get a holiday, they got a cheap one thanks to my affiliation with the hotel I worked at.

"That's not the point Denny," I started. "My dad is sick."

"So? He'll get better." Denny looked me up and down, trying to work out what I meant, but he just couldn't fit the pieces together.

"No he won't." I cried, the words getting caught in my throat. I felt a lone tear roll down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away. "He's dying."

"Oh, um…" Denny was lost for words and I don't know why that made me angry. Maybe I just wanted someone to tell me it was going to be okay, but he didn't, he just stood there dumbstruck.

"Is that all you have to say?" I demanded.

"Well what do you want me to say?" He asked in exasperation.

I huffed. "I don't know. Maybe something like sorry or I'm here for you. But no all I get from you is 'oh, um…' so comforting Denny, no honestly you should get a medal for that effort."

"Jesus, are you done?" He asked. I looked at Denny square in the eye and I knew in that moment that the man looking back at me would never feel the same way for me as I felt for him.

What sort of man didn't comfort their girlfriend? He was supposed to love me, but I wasn't so sure anymore. He didn't even seem to care that I was going back to Australia, far away from him, from all that we had created together. That's what hurt the most.

So many things ran through my mind, too many for me to keep track of. I was a sea of emotions, I was angry and sad but also fearful and anxious. I couldn't make head nor tails of my emotions or my actions and everything seemed to unravel in a huge rush.

"You know what Denny. I am done." I stated, my resolve strong. It was a rash decision, but probably the greatest choice I ever made.

"Good." He said, smiling at me.

"I don't think you understand what I meant. I meant I am done with you. I want to break up." I clarified. Denny face went through a series of changes. First he was shocked, then looked like he was suffering, then he was angry, really angry.

"You're breaking up with me?" He yelled. I guess he wasn't used to his favourite toy being taken away from him. "Nobody breaks up with me."

"Looks like I'm the first." I said, somehow keeping my cool. "Besides I'm going home and I don't know how long for. Are you really going to wait for me?"

"I would wait for you." He said impetuously.

"No you wouldn't. You and I both know that." I admitted. It was sad, because for the longest time I thought that he was the one, but I guess when we have to face reality things come into perspective.

"Come on Liz, we're great together." He said, grasping at straws and I honestly didn't know what he was trying to cling to.

"No we aren't. I'll ask you a simple question. What is my dad dying off?" I asked.

"I don't know, you never told me." He said.

"You never asked." I replied quickly.

"And what's your point?" Denny asked, searching my face for an answer.

"The point is Denny, I want someone who asks. I want someone that knows me inside and out." I answered honestly.

I felt the balloon begin its decent back to the old airfield we had taken off from and to say I was relieved was a bit of an understatement.

"Fine," Denny huffed. "I'm breaking up with you then." He said childishly, he always had to have the last word and it drove me insane.

"You can't do that, I already broke up with you." Okay, so I might have been equally as childish, he sort of brought the worst out in me.

"Yes, I can. I just did." He smirked.

"No you really can't." I counted as I looked over the edge of the basket, something I instantly regretted as I was instantly overcome with the urge to vomit. I could see the airfield slowly coming into focus, and I couldn't wait for this hellish ride to be over.

"You know who never says no?" He asked roguishly, a sneer twisting his lips. "Mary King."

I narrowed my eyes at him. In the back of my mind I knew something was going on, I guess I was just happier to stay in my own little fantasy world then face reality.

Mary King worked with us at the hotel, she was the same age as me, just a lot _friendlier_ and Canadian. I never liked her, it don't know whether it was her smug smile or the way she liked to leer at all the boys.

"You know what? I'm not even surprised." I bite out. I could see the red dirt coming closer and closer and all I could do was try and formulate my own escape plan.

I was to fly back to Bangkok that afternoon while Denny carried on up north and I was so glad I was able to get on the flight I did. I was only going to be in Bangkok for a day, enough time to pack up properly, then I would start my journey home.

I chose not to speak to Denny any further and I just plain ignored him on our ride back to the hotel. He waited in the foyer while I ran up the stairs to grab my bags. I didn't even say goodbye as I jumped into my taxi to the airport, what was the point?

The taxi ride to the airport was a short one, twenty minutes at best. I took it as an opportunity to soak in the last of Laos. I took a moment to memorise the exact shade of green the trees were and how red the soil was. It was dusty and dirty, but it was oddly comforting.

I didn't know what to expect when I got home. Would I get some huge welcome or a simple family _barbie_? I didn't know just how sick my dad was or how my mum was coping. There was so many unknowns, and that scared me more than I had ever been scared in my life.

I soon discovered that you have never truly been in an airport until you have sat in an airport in Laos. There was two gates only, on to Cambodia, the other to Thailand. Every flight was delayed and there was no shops in which to buy any sort of drinks or snacks. I was thankful that I had my book to read or I would have gone crazy from the boredom.

It was 8PM by the time I got to board my flight, it was a seven hour delay, and it was then I made myself a promise to be strong and not give into the temptation of staying. I would comfort my family, stay the right amount of time and leave again.

There was nothing there for me anymore, no job, no house, no life. All my old friends had long moved on as I had. All I had was my family, but they couldn't feel that void in my life that I was desperately missing.

I thought moving around would complete me, make me happy. I was wrong. I was desperately lonely, even surrounded by people, I never felt like I belonged. I guess that's why I was so scared of going home.

I was scared of belonging and I was scared I would stay.

 **AN: I'm shocked at the response that my story has gotten. Thank you all so much. I have made a YouTube playlist if anyone in interested, the link is in my profile, and I will update it each time I update the story.**

 **Barbie –** _Aussie slang for Barbeque and we eat prawns not shrimp!_


	3. Wilder Mind

Chapter Three: Wilder Mind

" _It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not."_

 **André Gide**

Being back in Bangkok wasn't what I thought it would be, I thought it would give me piece of mind, but all it did was make me grow anxious. Maybe it was because I was only to be there for a day before I would have to board another plane back to Australia.

The first thing I did when I landed in the bustling city was catch a taxi straight back to the hotel where I worked, my intention was to tell my boss exactly what was going on and prayed he wouldn't be too angry with my sudden departure.

Being back at the hotel without Denny was weird to say the least. As soon as I walked through the doors I was met with sideways glances and curious stares, they weren't expecting me back so soon. I saw Mary King as I walked through the lobby, she instantly went pale and dropped the stack of towels she was carrying. It was oddly satisfying for me.

I brushed straight past her, as far as I was concerned she could have Denny, he would just do the same to her when he got bored anyways. I glanced back at her, she stood stiff as a board a look of shock plastered across her face. Did she want to me to slap her? Punch her? Make some nasty comment? That wasn't how I rolled, it took a special kind of person to get that kind of reaction out of me.

Harrington's office was down next to the kitchens, a perfectly situated office for a man of his girth. John Harrington, my direct manager, was a portly man with a red face and watery blue eyes. He was balding and in a desperate attempt to retain his youth he wore a truly terrible toupee that always seemed to be askew.

I stood outside the door to his office, I took a deep breath to try and gather my thoughts and I knocked quickly.

"Come in." I heard from behind the door.

I opened the door and came face to face with John. He was gorging on some Pad Thai, what a surprise, he always seemed to be stuffing his face with something.

"Hi John," I greeted. "Can we have a quick chat?"

He gestured for me to sit in one of the chairs in front of his desk, I shut the door behind me and sat down without hesitation.

"Lizzie, you're back early, not that I mind we could use your help around here."

"Well, that's what I'm here to talk to you about. I need to go back home."

"Oh, may I ask you why?"

"You can. My dad is sick."

"Oh I'm sorry." He looked around awkwardly, trying desperate to avoid my gaze. John was a lot of things but empathetic wasn't one of them

"So consider this my notice, I have a flight out tonight. I'm just back here to pack the last of my stuff and to tell you."

"Alright then Liz, it's been a pleasure. You've given me the least trouble, so if you ever find yourself back here and in need of job don't be stranger."

I thanked him and slipped out of his office, left the hotel and went to the small apartment I shared with a few of the girls I worked with.

Packing was easy, I wasn't particularly sentimental so I didn't really have much to pack anyways. I sent a message to my roommates informing them of the situation, they were all understanding and the situation actually worked out perfectly as there was a girl who had just started and needed a place to live, she could now take my room.

It was all too easy, there had to be catch, things just never run this smoothly ever.

Turns out my luck timed out on me as soon as I got to the airport. First there was an issue with my booking which was quickly solved with the exchange of a few dollars. Then my flight was delayed for three hours, but at least this time there was restaurants and some small gift stores I could peruse. When I finally managed to board the plane we ended up sitting on the tarmac for an hour and a half because someone was running late for our flight. Had this been anywhere else in the world we would have left without them.

As we sat waiting for the very rude passenger, I couldn't help be smile at my luck. I had a whole row to myself, I could stretch out and get comfortable and nobody could complain. I soon discovered that my entertainment system wasn't working, not that I minded I had my music and my book, I was golden. I stuffed my ear buds into my ears and cranked up the sound to drown out the baby that decided that this was the opportune time to start crying. I was in heaven.

I had read all of ten pages when I felt someone shove pass me to claim the window seat. I looked up over my book and saw the most gorgeous man I had ever seen in my life. He had tousled black hair, the kind you just want to run your hands through and the most vibrant green eyes I had ever seen. I never knew such a shade existed. His face was contorted into an unattractive scowl when he glanced over to me and I quickly paused my music, expecting him to say something.

He huffed as he sat down, trying to get his own entertainment system working for the ten hour flight. I couldn't help but smirk when I discovered that his was broken as well. Sweet, sweet justice.

"What are looking at?" He said with a distinct British accent.

I pulled the earbuds from my ears. "Nothing."

"Humph." He grumbled and turned his back to me.I shrugged and turned my attention back to my novel, putting my earbuds back in as I did so.

It wasn't long until the plane began to taxi to the runway and I felt my heart speed up and I gripped my arm rests like a vice when the plane began to take off. My knuckles turned white and I began to question why I keep boarding flights when all it does is terrify me.

When we safely at cruising altitude I managed to calm down and flick on the overhead reading light, something I instantly regretted.

"Must you have that on?" I heard over my music.

I paused my music to hear him better. "Yes, I'm trying to read." I told him, I paid for my flight just like him, why shouldn't I be able to use my reading light?

"I saw." He sneered. "Bridget Jones' Diary. Sad and desperately single are we?"

"I left my Proust at home." I bit back.

He snorted. "Sure you did. So let me guess, you did the obligatory backpack of South East Asia in an attempt to find yourself."

"Oh damn, am I that transparent? Here I thought that it was my little secret."

"Typical."

I turned back to my book, trying to ignore him once more. All I ended up doing was reading the same line over and over again. I sighed and turned my attention back to the mystery man.

"You know what, there is no need to be a jerk." I huffed.

"I'm not being a jerk, I'm trying to sleep and your light is keeping me awake." He smirked. "That makes you the jerk." He pulled the purple blanket the airline had supplied up to his neck, it would have been adorable if he wasn't such an ass.

"I want to read and my entertainment system is broken, so you are just going to have to put up with it. Anyways, I wasn't aware I was committing a crime."

"The only crime is that novel." He said sardonically.

"I'll have you know that this is an essential piece of literature for any singleton."

"Come on, I've seen the movie, it's a farce. Love doesn't work that way."

"Why not? It could, love works in mysterious ways."

"It doesn't make sense. The main character has nothing going for her and yet she still ends up with the rich, hot guy. It's not how it works."

"That's not really an accurate assessment though is it? Bridget it flawed yes, but we're all flawed."

Bridget Jones was a literary figure I could really get behind. She was embodied all the insecurities and fears every woman has experienced in their lives and taught me that anything can be cured with a little Shakkakahn and vodka.

The man looked at me sceptically. "She hates the guy the majority of the time, then does a complete 360, that just never happens."

"Well I'm not saying I hate you, but I would turn off your life support to charge my phone." Smooth Bennet, you sure know how to charm gorgeous men.

"That's great to know, I don't like you either." It was oddly comforting to hear him say that, it made my dislike more justifiable.

"Then it's agreed, we hate each other and vow to never fall in love."

"That's a vow I can definitely keep. You're not my type anyway."

"What? You like a little woman who will always agree with you and stick to the kitchen?"

"No, I just prefer hot blondes." He said casually. "And you are neither hot nor blonde. So no risk of me ever falling for the likes of you." He really was rude, but at least he had the courage to say it my face.

"That's cool. You're not my type either. I prefer that my men come without a stick stuck up there ass."

"Hm…"

I flipped him the bird. "You know what, I wasn't born with enough middle fingers to show you just how I feel about you." I un-paused my music and went right back to ignoring him.

Like most women I was a true romantic at heart. The Notebook brought me to tears every time and I still have not gotten over Joey and Pacey from Dawson's Creek. Jane Eyre and Rochester, Mark Antony and Cleopatra, Jim and Pam. I aspired to have a love like there's and I would settle for nothing less. I would rather die alone surrounded by cats then be stuck with a man I didn't love with my whole heart.

I glanced over to the man, he looked deep in thought with a scowl on his face. Was he brooding? Do people even brood? Is that a thing? I felt my eyes beginning to close on their own and soon drifted off into a light sleep.

I was disturbed a few times, mainly for food and drinks, but as a whole the rest of the flight past without any further interacted with the horrible man sharing my row. I never did turn off my reading light.

Relief washed over me when we landed, I was finally able to escape that man. I just about ran off the plane and passed through customs with ease. I stopped only to collect my bag from the carousel and went to meet my sister waiting in the terminal.

It felt weird being back here, but strangely right.

I spotted Jane easily, she was tall, blonde and insanely beautiful. Beside her was a man I'd never met, but they look awfully friendly. He was only just taller than Jane, with a shock of red hair and the kindest face I had ever had the privilege of looking upon.

"Jane." I called out as I ran to see her.

I crashed into her and pulled her into a big hug. "Lizzie, I'm so glad to see you." She laughed. "How was the flight?"

"You wouldn't believe it, I sat next to the biggest asshole on the planet." I pulled away from her.

"I'm sure he wasn't so bad." She gave me a sympathetic look. Jane always saw the best in everyone, it was one of the things I admired about her, I was far too cynical in that respect.

"He was worse."

"Oh, Liz this is my..." Jane was cut off, by the red head.

"Will, Will over here." He shouted.

He was waving frantically at a dark haired man, who turned around at the call of his name. I couldn't believe it, it was the jerk from the plane and he was heading straight for us.

This kind of thing only ever movies and I instantly starting asking myself who the hell I pissed off in a past life for this to happen to me.

 **AN: I actually had no idea America ever called flip-flops thongs! That is actually awesome, I thought us Aussie were just really weird. When we were coming home from Thailand we actually sat on the tarmac for God knows how long because someone was running late, it was mental. So our 10 hour flight turned into more of a 12 hour one. I actually love reading your reviews so please keep posting them. If you have any questions feel free to PM me, I won't bite.**


	4. Walk In The Rain

Chapter Four: Walk in the Rain

" _Home is people. Not a place. If you go back there after the people are gone, then all you can see is what is not there anymore."_

 **Robin Hobb**

It was raining when we left the airport, the clouds dark and threatening. It was the perfect reflection of my mood. I would have rather been anywhere other than sitting in a car with Will Darcy AKA the worse person in the world.

I had since found out that the red headed man that was waiting with Jane was in fact her boyfriend, I assumed so, but then again you know what they say about making assumptions. His name was Charlie and for someone who seemed so nice I couldn't help but ask what was wrong with him to have a friend like the man sitting beside me.

Like Will, Charlie hailed from London but had made the move to Melbourne two years prior in an effort to expand his business, something, according to Jane, was going amazingly.

Sitting in the backseat of Jane's old Corolla, with Will glaring daggers at me and trying to make small talk with Charlie, was not a situation I wanted to be in after such a long plane ride. Yet here I was and it was quickly apparent I had nothing in common with Charlie.

"So Charlie, do you have any siblings?" I asked. What are you supposed to make small talk about? The weather was crap, we could all see that, and footy season hadn't kicked off yet.

"I have two sisters, Louisa and Caroline." He replied. "I'm the youngest."

"Lizzie, you'll just love Caroline, she's so nice." Jane interjected. I heard Will snort contemptuously beside me.

"I'm _sure_ she's lovely. Who knows we might become best friends." I replied while Will snorted again. I shot him a dirty look, with only seemed to fuel him.

"She's super into fashion, we're going to the polo on Saturday, you should come along it would be a great chance for everyone to get to know each other." Dear, sweet Jane always wanting everyone to get along.

I rated going to the polo about as highly as I would rate going to get a frontal lobotomy. Actually, a frontal lobotomy would actually be a better alternative than drinking overpriced wine and making small talk with people I no interest in being friends with.

"Sorry, Jane." I started. "But I think I might have to give that one a miss. I want to spend some time with dad if you don't mind."

"Oh yes you must Lizzie," Charlie was the one to speak this time, always eager to please I observed. "There will be plenty of opportunities for you to meet my sisters." That made me smile, I liked Charlie already.

"So Will, what do you do?" I heard Jane ask.

"I'm a doctor."

"Do you have a specialty?"

"I want to move into Pediatrics."

That threw me for a loop. Will didn't particularly seem like the warm and fuzzy type that I would associate with being a pediatrician. He seemed so cold and distant and he was intensely rude.

"Oh wow, do you like it?"

"Love it."

"Jane, stop interrogating the man." Charlie laughed, Jane looked at him with mock indignation.

"He's your best friend, I should know a thing or two about him."

The rest of the car ride passed in much of the same fashion. Jane would ask Will a string of questions, he would only give one or two word answers, Charlie would tell her to stop and Jane would continue on anyways. That was just who Jane was, she was legitimately interested in knowing every little detail about a person, I think that's something that set her apart from everyone else, she actually cared.

We reached our destination, well my destination anyways, and Charlie helped me pull my bag from the boot of the car and Jane promised to call me later to organise a proper catch up at one of the bars down in Brunswick.

Charlie and Jane were living in a small apartment together in Toorak which may as well have been on the other side of the country, though in reality it was only a half an hour drive from my parents' house, but it was really a world away from where I was in the Western suburbs.

Jane had really moved up in the world and while I was slumming it at my parents' home in Footscray, she would get to potter around in her nice, new, pristine apartment. I had seen pictures of it, it was absolutely stunning, modest and understated, much like Jane herself.

Will had found a small rental in the same area as Jane and Charlie. I never thought I would be so thankful for something so small. Will would now be off the hook for everything, he would not be obligated to come along to events or dinners so my chance of running into him would be significantly decreased.

Staring up at the unassuming brown wooden door in front of me, I never felt so out of place. I had not stood in this spot for five years and it was still the same. The paint was still chipping and the doorbell was still lying broken on the ground. I took a deep breath to gather myself and rummaged through my hand bag for my set of keys. They still worked after all this time.

I realised when I walked into my parents' home just how little time had passed here. The wall by the front door hung pictures of me and my sisters ranging from infant to more recent. My parents wedding photo hung dead centre, my mum was quite the beauty back in the day, I noticed, when you took away the bad eighties perm and the huge puffy sleeves of her wedding gaudy wedding dress.

My mum, had this beautiful golden hair, the kind you imagine all princesses had, it was a mass of crazy curls, but somehow she always managed to keep it from going too astray. She had eyes as deep as the ocean and as blue as the sky. No wonder my dad fell for her, the biggest wonder was how she fell for him.

Dad was, in short, the complete opposite of her. He was a small man with mousy brown hair that always seemed to lay flat no matter what he did. He wore glasses that were far too for his narrow face and had a very impressive moustache that seemed to be perpetually tinged with red from all the wine he drank.

My parents were opposites in more ways than one. Dad was an academic, always on the hunt for new information, with a dry wit and an insatiable thirst for travel, he was my greatest confidant. For my five years abroad, we never failed to email each other once a week or missed our monthly phone calls.

Mum, on the other hand, loved to gossip and worked as a dance teacher at the local ballet studio. It seemed to me her life's ambition is to see all of us girls married and popping out a few kids. Something, as much of a romantic as I was, I never thought possible for myself, only the deepest of love would ever entice me into marriage and children were just a huge no-no in my book. Instead I would delight in spoiling all of Jane's children and teach them very bad ballet.

I left my bags by the front door as I had no clue where I would be sleeping. My room had since been turned into a sewing room so mum could put together all the costumes for her students. That woman could do anything with a sewing machine.

"Mum? Dad?" I called out as I wandered further into the house.

I heard a giggle and bang from upstairs. Walking tentatively to the foot of the stairs I managed to see what was happening on the landing upstairs. My sisters Lydia and Kitty were sitting on the couch watching what I assumed was some reality show.

Walking up the stairs their giggles grew louder and I took a moment to appraise just how much they had grown in the two years since I had seen them. Gone were the gangly, awkward young teens with braces. In their place had developed two beautiful women. Kitty had been blessed with red hair like me and in turn also suffered with pale milky skin. Freckles dotted her face giving her a childish appearance, but her hazel eyes were wise beyond her nineteen years. Lydia on the other hand was blonde, blue eyed and tanned, she fit the Australian stereotype perfectly.

I coughed to get their attention when I reached the landing, inadvertently making Kitty jump out of her skin.

"It's just Lizzie, Kitty no need to get your knickers in a twist." Lydia said as she whipped her head in my direction.

"Oh, it's just Lizzie huh?" I laughed as Kitty bounded off the couch and practically tackled me into a hug.

"I missed you so much." She mumbled into my chest.

"Really? She's such a drag though." Lydia said, not moving from her seat.

"I missed you too Lydia."

"Sorry if you can't handle the truth." Kitty let me go and went back to sit with Lydia.

Soft footsteps padded on the carpet behind me, I turned and saw my other sister Mary approaching. She had also changed dramatically. She was the only one to inherit dad's mousy hair, but she had since hacked it all off and dyed it bright blue, something very out there for someone so reserved.

"Ignore her, she's just upset Carter hasn't bothered to message her since they played goon of fortune last weekend. Can't say I don't blame him, Lydia was the epitome of class." Mary said mockingly as she approached.

"Oh look its Captain Boring." Lydia cackled from across the room.

"Enough Lydia," I warned.

"I am not upset over Carter by the way, he was just a bit of fun."

"But you were just moaning about him two minutes ago" Kitty interjected.

"Shut up Kitty."

"But it's true." She protested.

Lydia took this as an opportunity to tackle Kitty into the couch, I couldn't help but laugh, somethings, it appeared, would never change.

I turned my attention back to Mary. "How University going? Dad tells me you've changed into film studies or something."

"I think I found where I belong with the other film freaks."

"I'm glad you like it. You'll do great things, you're the next Hitchcock for sure." I tried to be as encouraging as possible, Mary always seemed to get the short end of the stick.

"Well I'm not as kind as Jane, as adventurous as you, as skilled as Kitty or as vapid as Lydia. But I have my movies." Mary smiled, she really seemed to appreciate the effort.

"Oh shut up Mary you're boring everyone in the room." Lydia cried from her seat. "And what does vapid mean?"

"Look it up in a dictionary." Mary deadpanned.

Lydia stood up and pulled her phone from her pocket and asked Siri for the definition. _'Offering nothing that is stimulating or challenging.'_ Siri informed us with her annoying voice. She looked to Mary in shock.

"I am not vapid." Lydia ground out.

"Mazel Tov, you learnt something new." Lydia stalked across the room, I thought for a moment she was going to attack Mary, however this wasn't the case.

"I don't even know what that means." Lydia said as she poked Mary in the chest, Mary just rolled her eyes in response.

"Lydia, Pettifleur just called Gamble ' '. It's really starting to heat up." Kitty called from the couch. Lydia dropped her hand and walked back across the room to where Kitty was waiting for her, thank God for small mercies.

"What the hell are they even watching?" I asked Mary.

"The Real Housewives of Melbourne and yes it's just as terrible as you imagine it would be."

"Where's mum and dad?" I heard the familiar sound of keys jingling in the front door and my question had been answered for me.

Standing at the top of the stairs I had the perfect view of the front door. It was then I saw my dad for the first time since his diagnosis and he looked every bit as sick as he was. I felt tears prick my eyes as his frail form came through the front door, his skin waxy, stretching over her his gaunt cheeks.

He looked up to be and smiled, pure mirth dancing in eyes. I hoped beyond hope that he wouldn't lose that look at the end, I think that would be the saddest thing of all.

* * *

 **AN: I have decided to update early as I will be away from Thursday through till Tuesday next week.**

 **Thank you to everyone who has reviewed especially those who have pointed out a few errors. I have since gone back and fixed them up, especially the opaque one. I had thought I'd already fixed that, but going back I realised I had not so thanks for bringing that to my attention, it is really appreciated. I tried to fix my there & their mix ups but I'm sure I still missed some. I love the reviews, everyone has been so great and pointing out small errors are great for me, it drives me to make sure I don't get too lazy in my editing. **

**Footy –** _National Rugby League (NRL). The AFL is bigger in Melbourne, but as I'm not a fan of the game, I don't know enough about it to include it in the story. It's the Queenslander in me coming out._

 **Brunswick, Footscray and Toorak –** _Suburbs in Melbourne, google them. Brunswick is north, Footscray is west and Toorak is south-eastern._

 **Polo –** _Actually a strangely popular sport in Melbourne._

 **Goon of Fortune –** _Goon is cask wine, the cheaper the better. Goon of fortune is when you pull the bag from the box and peg it to a clothesline and spin it, the person it lands on has to drink. There are no real winners._

 **Real Housewives of Melbourne –** _It is a thing and it is strangely captivating. Pettifleur and Gamble are two of the housewives and yes Gamble was called ' ' in the latest episode._

 **Please keep reviewing!**


End file.
